What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
