She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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