You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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