Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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