Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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