guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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