I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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