you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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