too bad you live with your parents still
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
