I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
