Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Randomize
