If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize