The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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