I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
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