Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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