she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
