Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
