Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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