the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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