he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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