i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize