so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
