it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
