no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
