I puked a lego.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
