im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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