I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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