Do vagina's smell?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
