i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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