you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
