The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
