I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
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