hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
