i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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