Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
