my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
dude. I can hear the air.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
