I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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