I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
