he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize