Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
