Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
