Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
