so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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