I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
