she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
