just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
