shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
