he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
But theres a keg here and me gusta
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
i think im in europe. pls send help
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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