help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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