She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I have feelings that need drinking.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
