it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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