We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
