You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
